“What beautiful eyes she has!”This is a comment I hear often. My almost six month old has striking bright blue eyes. This time the commenter was an older woman. I thanked her politely and she added, “she better get used to it.”
She’d better get used to people commenting on her beautiful eyes. She needs to get used to people commenting on her body because it’s already starting. She is female, which means her form is open for comment and critique. Soon enough they will comment on her weight, height, skin, figure, hair, makeup (or lack there of). She’d better get used to it. As soon as she starts to learn what her body can do she will have people telling her what to do with it. She’d better get used to it. Unwanted comments, unwanted looks, unwanted touches. She’d better get used to it.
No. I will not anesthetize my daughters to sexism and tell them it’s normal. I will not tell them “that’s just the way it is.” I will tell them that they are valuable. That they have agency. That they have power. I will not tell them that they better get used to it. I will tell them that I will work with them to change it.