“I shouldn’t say, ‘can she eat that?’ What should I say?” Excellent question!
If I am handing the food to Hazel there’s no need to say anything.
If you are offering food, asking me (or Matt) discreetly before offering it to her is ideal. There’s a myriad of reasons beyond type 1 that we may not want Hazel to have a cupcake at that moment.
Other ways to be thoughtful:
1. Save nutritional information for us. I’m getting very good at figuring things out, but nutritional info makes everything easier.
2. Give me advance notice if possible. I got an email today from a neighbor saying they were planning on sharing hot cocoa with the neighborhood kids this afternoon (yes, we live on Sesame Street). Knowing this is going to happen helps me prepare. Other times friends have sent me a basic menu of food that would be available at a party or gathering. I don’t need anyone to change their menu or not share hot cocoa, but the more food related info I have going into a situation the better I can care for Hazel.
3. Please don’t exclude Hazel. She is a very observant three year old. We are working to help her have a healthy relationship with type 1 diabetes and food. Having her treated the same as other kids helps.